Assistant Principals' Lives are Measured in Dog Years

Work is work.  I like it.  I like solving problems.

I've been working a little over two months.  (Sing a chorus of "Back in the Saddle Again.")  The days fly by.  The nights fly by.  I enjoy listening to WDEN as I drive into town.  I am happy.  Change is in the air.  We're working on the work.  Noses to the ground.  Shoulders to the grindstone.

I've met hundreds of great teachers and thousands of terrific students.

Most days it's like being an assistant principal on steroids.

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Currently, I talk to lots of people with problems.  Most of it is in the communication between people.  There are very few absolutes in my line of work.  Education is not for the faint of heart.

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Most of my crazy, funny stories come from my stint as an assistant principal.  Now, that's a job that should be measured in dog years on the salary scale!

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Ten Years Ago-- Circa 2003

Friday night.  I'm finally home.  The phone rings.

I answer.

Mother of wronged child states in her best Law and Order Voice, "I am an attorney. My child has been wrongly accused of smoking a cigarette.  She would never do this.  She told me so.  She said you are out to get her. Why did you call me and tell me that she was smoking, Dr. Weaver?  She has told me repeatedly that she was not smoking.  Why are you so unfair?  Why did you make it up?"  Woooo, she was ramped up.

"Ma'am, I saw her.  I saw her with my own two eyes."

"Dr. Weaver, she says she was not smoking."

"Well," I began.  "Ask her if she was holding a lit cigarette out in back of the vocational building and if she had smoke coming out of her mouth when I saw her.  She was either smoking or she was on fire."

LONG, LONG, LONG pause of the other end of the telephone conversation as mom and daughter discuss the semantics of the phrase "smoking a cigarette".

Words sweet as honey then greeted me from my formerly irate attorney mom, "Dr. Weaver, I hope you have a nice evening.  Thank you so much for dealing with my lying child.  I will be taking care of this at my end.  Please accept my apologies for acting like a fool."

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Slam Dunk